Oh the NOT to do list…I can’t say that I have one specifically, but I do occasionally write down the things I wish I had time to do in my journal. When I stumble back across those lists many years later I find that many of the things I did wind up doing to one extent or another. And chuckling at how unfortunate some of the other things I didn’t end up doing.
I have the same thing. Sometimes I go back to lists of things that I am going to do later and found that, somehow, I have accomplished them without realising!
This is great, Emma. It reminds me of that book “all I need to know I learned in kindergarten“ it’s been years since I read it, but I just really remember the author talking about how there were so many more important things than mowing his lawn. For instance, spending time with his grandkid.
Thank you so much Don! I really appreciate your comment.
And that sounds like an interesting book. I'm trying to resist looking it up and adding it to my never-ending list of books I want to read. For now I'm going to say 'I like your description of the book'! *grimaces in pain, wanting to look up said book* lol
Ha ha. Something not be necessary to read doesn't always affect whether it ends up on the list!
But, in all seriousness, I am sure this is all part of the same thing as wanting to grasp hold of material things. Just more insidious almost, because reading and learning and knowledge are good things, right?
I read this yesterday and wasn't in the right place for it as my not to do list is soooo enormous it brings me to overwhelm, but today I have revisited and I love that the comments have shown that it could be a release or lamentation or a hopeful future to do. Mine are all hopeful future to dos but definite not to do at the moment.
I love your list, mine is a similar eclectic mix 🤣
I think a list of hopeful future 'to do's is a valuable thing to have (I have that list too!), but I would push back and say it is a completely different thing to a 'not to do' list. A 'not to do' is a list of things I am not doing RIGHT NOW. It says zero about the future. These things may make their way onto a 'doing now' list, or a 'hopefully will do one day' list, but those are different lists! (I need to update my 'list of lists'!)
Everybody's 'not to do' list is enormous, to the point of being infinite. Everyone's 'currently doing' list is going to be a different size, depending on our own (unfairly allocated) resources. But I think that is the point. We all have to make choices over how to spend our limited time, energy and money.
I don't think overall my brain differentiates, so I want to do all of the things but can't. I think the differentiating and different lists are more subconscious for me. I love how your brain is much better at categorising than mine. I think that's also why you're more successful with bullet journals etc. I lose the details. x
Ha ha ha Did you google 'Scriptorium' Sharon, or did you click my links in the post? Because... I feel like the two images could be... slightly different! 😅
I absolutely love this way of writing, thinking of NOT DOING. I am good at checking off the to do list. Or I used to be. Now if I make one, I forget to look.
I AM NOT LOOKING AT MY TO DO LIST, the one I don't remember or know what is on it. If I remember, it gets done and must have been important to me or someone I care about.
I find as I am getting older I have few TO DO's, there is so much I am NOT DOING.
Doing whatever I want, more spontaneously. I AM NOT DOING THINGS FOR OYTHER PEOPLE WHEN THEY CAN LEARN TO DO IT FOR THEMSELVES. I AM NOT AN ENABLER OF SORTS. I am being kind. This for this powerful piece on NOT DOING.
I did just return from a trip. I cleaned my house as this helps me land—it's a habit for grounding.
"If I remember, it gets done and must have been important to me or someone I care about."
A great way to think about 'to do' lists! I prefer emptying everything out of my head as much as possible, and keeping all that detritus in carefully managed lists. lol
I love this post. When I read your mention of a NOT to do list in last week's post I was dying to see it. As I read through it, I was gleefully casting off the expectations with you. I'll admit though, by the end of the post I wasn't completely clear if this is really a releasing of past expectations or a lamentation of things you really hope to do but conceded you might not complete; at least not too soon. Regardless, the idea is powerful. I enjoyed the ride through your list. I have harbored secret aspirations to many items on your list. Some I haven't formally removed; most I have. With my professional life and a lot of my personal interest devoted to computers and their associated concepts I giggled wildly when I got to the XML and SEO part.
By contrast (or analogy) I have been going through a period of limited focus and low energy and I have conceded that I must remove expectations I have layered on myself since childhood to manage the energy that I do have to create opportunity for joy, where available to me. I think you have inspired me to put it in words, at least for myself. It felt powerful to read yours.
I’m glad you enjoyed the post, and I’m especially glad it made you laugh! That was my intention. And I sympathise with the low energy and limited focus. Putting things into words and externalising them is really valuable, I think.
It was helpful to hear that the intention of the post wasn’t clear. So, it is just a list of some of the things that are not on my ‘to do’ list right now, and, conversely, are on my literal (it is a word document!) ‘not to do’ list.
It is neither a lamentation nor a release of expectations. ‘It is what it is’ as Oliver Burkeman said in the podcast I mentioned last week. (That phrase was also the refrain of the wonderful CPN I used to have!)
Some of the things I hope I *will* be able to do sooner or later, but, well, it is an ever growing list, so I’ll have to see…
Oh the NOT to do list…I can’t say that I have one specifically, but I do occasionally write down the things I wish I had time to do in my journal. When I stumble back across those lists many years later I find that many of the things I did wind up doing to one extent or another. And chuckling at how unfortunate some of the other things I didn’t end up doing.
I have the same thing. Sometimes I go back to lists of things that I am going to do later and found that, somehow, I have accomplished them without realising!
This is great, Emma. It reminds me of that book “all I need to know I learned in kindergarten“ it’s been years since I read it, but I just really remember the author talking about how there were so many more important things than mowing his lawn. For instance, spending time with his grandkid.
Thank you so much Don! I really appreciate your comment.
And that sounds like an interesting book. I'm trying to resist looking it up and adding it to my never-ending list of books I want to read. For now I'm going to say 'I like your description of the book'! *grimaces in pain, wanting to look up said book* lol
Ha ha, I know what you mean. It was a best seller at the time, and included a follow up, but I don’t think it’s necessary for you to read it.
Ha ha. Something not be necessary to read doesn't always affect whether it ends up on the list!
But, in all seriousness, I am sure this is all part of the same thing as wanting to grasp hold of material things. Just more insidious almost, because reading and learning and knowledge are good things, right?
Well, you know what they say: too much of a good thing ……
Maybe that doesn’t apply to books ha ha!
I read this yesterday and wasn't in the right place for it as my not to do list is soooo enormous it brings me to overwhelm, but today I have revisited and I love that the comments have shown that it could be a release or lamentation or a hopeful future to do. Mine are all hopeful future to dos but definite not to do at the moment.
I love your list, mine is a similar eclectic mix 🤣
A thought provoking piece thanks!!
I think a list of hopeful future 'to do's is a valuable thing to have (I have that list too!), but I would push back and say it is a completely different thing to a 'not to do' list. A 'not to do' is a list of things I am not doing RIGHT NOW. It says zero about the future. These things may make their way onto a 'doing now' list, or a 'hopefully will do one day' list, but those are different lists! (I need to update my 'list of lists'!)
Everybody's 'not to do' list is enormous, to the point of being infinite. Everyone's 'currently doing' list is going to be a different size, depending on our own (unfairly allocated) resources. But I think that is the point. We all have to make choices over how to spend our limited time, energy and money.
I don't think overall my brain differentiates, so I want to do all of the things but can't. I think the differentiating and different lists are more subconscious for me. I love how your brain is much better at categorising than mine. I think that's also why you're more successful with bullet journals etc. I lose the details. x
I have never heard of a Scriptorium before today and that sounds lovely!! I want to go.
I had to look it up! And wow! I have an image in my head now that I regret I will not be creating in my home 😂
Ha ha ha Did you google 'Scriptorium' Sharon, or did you click my links in the post? Because... I feel like the two images could be... slightly different! 😅
LOL! No I just did a Look Up from my phone and my brain set the scene. I have to say mine looks much more like the Bodleian
Can't go wrong with the Bodleian, to be fair! (Which my autocorrect changed to Boolean... You can definitely go wrong with boolean, I fear! 😂)
I know, right?! I really want *someone* to set one up around here! (But a nice, inclusive one!)
I absolutely love this way of writing, thinking of NOT DOING. I am good at checking off the to do list. Or I used to be. Now if I make one, I forget to look.
I AM NOT LOOKING AT MY TO DO LIST, the one I don't remember or know what is on it. If I remember, it gets done and must have been important to me or someone I care about.
I find as I am getting older I have few TO DO's, there is so much I am NOT DOING.
Doing whatever I want, more spontaneously. I AM NOT DOING THINGS FOR OYTHER PEOPLE WHEN THEY CAN LEARN TO DO IT FOR THEMSELVES. I AM NOT AN ENABLER OF SORTS. I am being kind. This for this powerful piece on NOT DOING.
I did just return from a trip. I cleaned my house as this helps me land—it's a habit for grounding.
"If I remember, it gets done and must have been important to me or someone I care about."
A great way to think about 'to do' lists! I prefer emptying everything out of my head as much as possible, and keeping all that detritus in carefully managed lists. lol
Yes, an empty head is great
I believe you can make more noise that way! 😉 (Joking - sort of!)
I hear you 😂
I love this post. When I read your mention of a NOT to do list in last week's post I was dying to see it. As I read through it, I was gleefully casting off the expectations with you. I'll admit though, by the end of the post I wasn't completely clear if this is really a releasing of past expectations or a lamentation of things you really hope to do but conceded you might not complete; at least not too soon. Regardless, the idea is powerful. I enjoyed the ride through your list. I have harbored secret aspirations to many items on your list. Some I haven't formally removed; most I have. With my professional life and a lot of my personal interest devoted to computers and their associated concepts I giggled wildly when I got to the XML and SEO part.
By contrast (or analogy) I have been going through a period of limited focus and low energy and I have conceded that I must remove expectations I have layered on myself since childhood to manage the energy that I do have to create opportunity for joy, where available to me. I think you have inspired me to put it in words, at least for myself. It felt powerful to read yours.
I’m glad you enjoyed the post, and I’m especially glad it made you laugh! That was my intention. And I sympathise with the low energy and limited focus. Putting things into words and externalising them is really valuable, I think.
It was helpful to hear that the intention of the post wasn’t clear. So, it is just a list of some of the things that are not on my ‘to do’ list right now, and, conversely, are on my literal (it is a word document!) ‘not to do’ list.
It is neither a lamentation nor a release of expectations. ‘It is what it is’ as Oliver Burkeman said in the podcast I mentioned last week. (That phrase was also the refrain of the wonderful CPN I used to have!)
Some of the things I hope I *will* be able to do sooner or later, but, well, it is an ever growing list, so I’ll have to see…